backwards
by SFP83
Summary: Inu/YuYu crossover. I think the title explains better then anything . . .


Backwards

By SFP

This has now been looked at _and_ corrected by my wonderful, talented and oh so generous beta, BrokenSouledPoetess, if you haven't read any of her works, you should! Right after your done reading this.

A/N: at the suggestion of a dear reviewer, Gothic Lust, and because of the joking quips from Madmiko that make me feel better, I am trying my hand at writing while on my pain meds for my back injury. This is not to be taken seriously, it is a parody. If it isn't good, don't blame me (or them) blame the narcotics.

Gothic Lust, this was the first thing that popped into my head after I received your review. Hope you enjoy my fuzzy brain function.

DISCLAIMER: Inuyasha belongs to Rumiko Takahashi. YuYu Hakusho belongs to Yoshihiro Togashi.

One shot

The detectives all walked down one of the great halls of Spirit World at a sedate pace, their strides unhurried and nonchalant. It was a beautiful afternoon and, unfortunately, Koenma had called upon them, once again, to help him out with something he had bumbled up. At least that is what they all assumed. He hadn't really told Botan why they were to personally come into the Spirit World as he usually sent them tapes, even if it was a little bit of an out-dated way to communicate. Sometimes he would even come to see them in person, or spirit, or whatever the hell his form was called when he came to Ningenkai.

Anyway, this time it was different. He wanted them to drop whatever they had been doing, no exceptions, and immediately come to his office, something about a life and death emergency. Humph, like they hadn't heard that one before! Anything the diminutive ruler of the Reikai wanted them to check into was usually a serious case of life and death, at least to the godling's way of thinking it was. He was such a paranoid little freak sometimes.

Upon entering the spirit realm, all four young men came to a silent consensus; they were not going to be rushed into anything. Half the time Koenma was in such a rush to get the problem taken care of, that he would send them out with half-ass information, usually making the problem that much worse for them and who ever they were dealing with at the time.

The last mission they had been on (which, what do you know, had also been a life or death situation, according to the demigod)had landed them in the middle of a family dispute. However, not just any family dispute, _no_, this had been a family dispute between two of the ruling houses in the demon realm. And why did they end up in the middle of it? Because Koenma had gotten his facts mixed up again, that's why!

There had not been any kind of kidnapping, as he had been so adamant that there was! Nope, there had however, been a runaway bride who did not want to mate the male her parents had picked out, and an elopement, or in demon terms, secret mating, with the male she did love.

Even Kurama, the most reasonable and level-headed out of their bunch, had been upset with the wild goose chase.

They had just come around the corner of the long, wide hallway when they heard the commotion. They all stopped in their tracks, giving each other questioning looks. Even Hieis' eyebrows were knitted together slightly with inquiry, which in itself was odd. Had they been wrong? Could the situation actually warrant their attention? Could Koenma be in danger . . . ?

A loud bang against one of the walls to Koenma's office punctuated their thoughts. It was followed up shortly by a distinctly female scream. Without looking at each other again, the spirit detectives ran the rest of the way down the hallway until they reached their ultimate destination, Koenma's office. Hiei was the first one to reach the door, though he didn't open it. Why should he rush in and save the stupid brat godling? He was still irritated about last week's mission. Besides, maybe Koenma would learn to . . . What was the human saying? Not cry wolf demon? Yes, that had to be the saying he was thinking of.

Kurama and Yusuke followed after him shortly, though when they arrived at the door – instead of standing still for a moment to let whatever might be endangering the prince's life get a decent hit in - Yusuke opened it, then immediately hit the deck as a paperweight went sailing out the open door, just millimeters from where his face had been only seconds before. Hiei smirked, now even more pleased that he hadn't opened the door. Yusuke cursed quietly, picking himself up off the ground.

"I SAID SHUT UP DAMMIT!!" a dark-haired, beautiful, human female yelled from inside Koenma's office.

Koenma was a god of great standing, but at the moment, both he and his personal assistant, an ogre that went by the name of George, were crouched down, hiding behind his desk, fearing for their very lives. Koenma's reply when spoken, was done so in a trembling, high pitched voice.

"Ye . . . Yes . . . Of . . . Of course . . . But it's just . . . . We didn't say anything! . . ." the miniature gods' voice quivered even more, his voice sounding more dispirited than anything they had ever heard from him before. " Ho . . .Hon . . . Honest!"

"What the hell is going on here?" Yusuke asked, hoping he would get an answer from either the demigod or the girl that could match Keiko's anger any day of the week. Nether answered him however. In fact, he didn't even think the girl realized him and the rest of his team were there. Koenma on the other hand, definitely noticed they were there.

"Koenma sir! Don't leave me!" George hollered in a pleading voice from behind the desk.

Yusuke looked at George, startled by his abrupt yelling, only to look back down in confusion at the weight that now adorned his left leg. 'How the hell did that little shit move so fast? I didn't even see him move! And why the hell is he on me?!' Koenma had wrapped himself around the spirit detectives' leg with a death-like grip. Yusuke tried valiantly to shake him off. The godling didn't budge, except to continue trembling. "What the hell is your problem Koenma?"

The lesser god removed one of his chubby little hands from Yusuke, only long enough to point a wobbly finger in the human woman's direction, and then continued his two-handed, trembling grip.

Everyone, besides George and Koenma, who both had their eyes squeezed closed and seemed to be praying to the higher-gods, looked back to the young woman in confusion. Was she talking to them? Because if she was, she wasn't making any sense, at least not to them she wasn't.

"No! How the hell should I know who they are? I've never met them before!! Now will you please just shut up so I can take care of this mess?" The woman rubbed her temples with both hands, clearly frustrated with something. What? No one knew, well besides her that is. The woman was also quite clearly crazy. No one had said a word to her since Koenma's frightened rambling about not saying anything! Her face softened into a somewhat sad little smile before she spoke again. "No, no, sweetie. I don't blame you. You were just trying to help that's all. I understand that. Nevertheless, right now I really need to get this . . . mess straightened out and in order to do that, I need quiet and lots of it."

After a few quiet seconds passed, the girl looked up at them. Not only was she quite obviously crazy, she also appeared rather tired. Her eyes beseeched them to help her, if only so she could rest.

It was also very surprising to at least two of the four detectives that they did not see the eyes of a crazy woman when she looked upon them. No, what they saw was weary desperation in its clearest form. What kind of torments was this woman suffering, to look upon them with such eyes?

"Who are you four?" Her voice was soft now, composed and concise with no hints towards mental instability.

Hiei snorted softly before speaking to the seemingly schizophrenic woman, surprising his teammates greatly. "That's the question we should be asking you, now isn't it?" He had meant the reply to be more scathing, but it had not come out that way. Instead, it had come out with hints of curiosity coloring it. He huffed quietly to himself. Sometimes he got a kick out of the weirdest things.

The girl blushed a little before bowing, "I apologize… that was extremely rude of me. My name is Kagome Higurashi." She straightened back up immediately after introducing herself, then whispered something under her breath that sounded suspiciously like "I know, sorry. It won't happen again . . . would it make you feel . . . better if I didn't do it?"

Koenma had perked up upon hearing the girls' name and his shaking receded most of the way. "You're Kagome Higurashi? The time traveling Miko who collects the jewel shards of the Shikon-no-tama? The one my father has told me so many stories about?"

The girl gave a nod as a reply in his direction before speaking once more. "Guilty as charged. Your father told me you could possibly fix my . . . current problems. He was also the one who told me to wait in your office for you."

The spirit detectives watched in avid fascination as the diminutive ruler seemed to regain his courage right there on the spot. And amazingly enough, suffered from no ill effects of having lost his spine just moments before. Koenma untangled himself from Yusuke, ignoring the man's slight huff of irritation. Then he walked back to his desk with his head held high. "George, get out of there right now! You're acting like a coward." George harrumphed at his boss quietly before crawling out from under the desk.

The team, which still stood in the hallway or in the doorway itself, moved completely into the room then. Some of them were unable to resist the urge to roll their eyes at Koenma's . . . antics.

Koenma folded his hands across the top of his desk, looked into Kagome's eyes and asked, "What is your problem and how might I help you fix it?"

"Well . . ." Kagome rubbed the back of her neck self-consciously, darting a look at the four males on Koenma's spirit detective team.

Koenma seemed to pick up on her line of thinking. "They're employees of mine and safe to talk in front of, I assure you."

Kagome seemed to think about it for a moment, sighing heavily, before whispering a "what other choice do we have?" She continued on in a normal speaking voice after that. "Here's the thing. Me and my group of friends have defeated Naraku and completed the jewel." She held up a hand seeing Koenmas' eyes light up in question. "That's not the problem . . . Well it kind of is . . . But not really . . . Damn this is hard to explain." She whispered the last part of her sentence more to her self then anyone else.

"You see . . . This is the problem . . . Shippo, my son, kind of . . . made a wish on the jewel." She started talking faster, defending her son to the best of her abilities. She would not let him be ridiculed by anyone . . . including demigods of questionable stature. "He was scared that I was going to leave him, because with the jewel being finished, he thought there wasn't any reason for me to stay. So he wished for me to always be with them. My group of friends that is."

They were all looking at her rather funny.

Kurama spoke up finally. "I don't see how that would be a problem, was it not what you would have wanted?"

Before Kagome could answer, Kuwabara asked a question, surprising his teammates with the seemingly well thought out inquiry. "If that was the kids wish, why are you here instead of with your son? Poor little guy must be scared to death."

"You have no idea." Kagome whispered under her breath, not knowing the demons of the group could hear her quite clearly. "My son is with me, along with all my other friends. You see, they were pulled into the jewel before it once more found its home within my body. I can hear and feel all of them, even right now as we speak. Somehow, the wish ended up backwards. Now I am stuck with all my friends and my son inside of the jewel, which is inside of me. And I do not know how to get them back out, or if it is even possible to get them out. I'm positive though, that if they stay inside me_,_ I will go crazy."

She paused, seemingly listening to something none of them could hear. Then she grumbled something that made all of them raise an eyebrow or two. "No Miroku. I am pretty sure that even with your divine focus I would still go crazy . . . especially when your 'divine focus' as you like to call it, is directed at women most of the time."

After another small pause, she continued with her seemingly one-sided conversation. "Humph! Holy man my ass! I can hear your thoughts just as well as you can hear mine you know. That's right Sango! You put him in his pla . . . . Ewww I so didn't need to know that Sango!"

Yusuke asked the question that was on everyone's minds. "Just how many friends do you have inside of you?!"

Kagome looked at him a startled expression scrawled across her face. Then she started naming off people at the same time as she counted them off on her fingers. "Well . . . let's see. First there's Shippo, then Inuyasha, Sango and finally, last but not least, Miroku. So… four total."

Kurama could not help it; he started laughing. Everyone took a step back, not knowing what to make of the laughing red head that was usually so much more . . . cool and collected. Well everyone except for Hiei who had what appeared to be a smirk on his own face, and Kagome who was looking at the fox as if he had lost his mind. She did not think it was the least bit funny!

"Humph! It's not funny!" She glared at everyone and yet no one in particular, sulking petulantly.

Kurama got himself under control, if only enough so he could apologize to the distraught woman. "I'm sorry. Really I am . . . It's just. . . I thought I had it bad." And with that he dissolved into laughter again.

Kagome gave him and the short man standing next to him, with the small smirk on his face, a strange look. She did not know why . . . but that comment made her feel better for some reason. She didn't even understand it now . . . . however, she was sure that given time, she would come to understand it. Eventually.

Koenma, who also had a small smile on his face, spoke up again, easing her immensely. "I'm sure we can figure out something to do about your backwards situation. Just give me a few hours to work out the details, and we'll have you and your friends as good as new."

"Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!! I'll forever be in your debt!!" Kagome was practically bouncing off the walls, she was so grateful.

Koenma got a small gleam in his eyes, after hearing, those words come out of her mouth. 'Forever in his debt huh?'

While everyone else groaned aloud, Yusuke smacked his palm to his own forehead. She would have to say those exact words wouldn't she? If there was anything in this world Koenma loved with a passion, it would be having beings of great power in his debt.

Kagome stopped bouncing. "What? Was it something I said?" She looked around at all the people surrounding her, but no one would meat her eye.

In addition, she completely missed the look that passed between the two demons standing within five feet of her.

Kurama quietly sidled up to her, and Hiei was standing right behind the two when Kurama asked a very important question of the girl. His eyes gleamed even brighter then Koenma's had just moment ago, when he heard the woman's answer.

"So tell me . . . What do you think of demons . . . Fox demons for instance? Or even fire demons?"

"I like them just fine. Didn't I mention that my son is a fox kit?"

Kurama and Hiei escorted Kagome out of the demigods' office, asking question as they went. . . .

Fin

Well I hope you all enjoyed that.

In addition, just for the pure entertainment of Madmiko:

You said you wanted him naked; I did one better for you!

Hiei streaks by with no clothing on. On his second trip by, he pauses, turns around and bends over. Long and behold, Madmikos' name has been tattooed upon his ass . . . At least until his demon healing kicks in anyway. . . . Hiei shakes his ass, and then speeds away as fast as he can, if nothing else just so he can get away from this crazy authoress.

(Ha, Ha, Ha. . . Sorry could not resist!)


End file.
